Will I Remember the Goodness of God?

Sitting in Starbucks, I take a sip of caramel goodness and mull over the graciousness of God. I wonder how much I take for granted. How many things I let pass by me without even taking the time to thank the Creator for them.

Things. People, Places, Plans, Conversations, Fresh Air, Vehicles, Bibles, Jobs, Water, Hard Work.

So. Many. Things.

But hear now, am I grateful? Is that a growl of complaint that just fell from my lips?
Why? Why do I allow myself to complain? To murmur in spite of the gifts God in His infinite kindness has bestowed. Are His ways not good enough for me? Do I think I know better? How dare I find fault in the ways of the Maker of the Universe!!

So as I sit here in introspection, my mind races. What if I trusted God?  Trusted that His ways are greater than my fears...than my plans. Trusted the Father to take care of His daughter?  Maybe He will dash my hopes and dreams. Maybe He will tear at the world so dear to me and break it all apart. Maybe He will bring me to my knees time and time again with painful cries of despair.

So be it. Let me fully TRUST that He will work all things together for HIS glory. Let me remember that I am His daughter. His servant. I have given myself completely to a terrifying and wonderful God.

"Safe?” said Mr. Beaver; “don’t you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you" -The Lion, the witch, and the Wardrobe  

Do I put God in a box? Treat Him as if He's my lucky charm? My life-line if I'm trouble?  How dare I put myself in a place above Him! It's as if He is my servant and I call upon Him when I am in need. When did I become so comfortable with the idea of God that I lost my respect?

Respect. A vital word. Why is it be counted as wise to have a FEAR of God? Maybe because He has every right to squash me like a bug. Maybe because He holds the whole universe in the palm of His hand...perfectly in balance, all while attending to the thoughts and emotions and actions of the billions of people on earth. Yet, even though we are commanded to fear God, we are also told to draw near to God. Seek His face.

The balance of a reverent awe (respect) and a trusting intimate relationship with the Savior. How could we understand it all? 

"Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it." Psalm 139:6

But I have learned that we can ask the Father. He knows we are but dust. He understands our confusion and our utter humanness. That's why He also made it possible for us to ask for wisdom. Wisdom from Him.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him." -James 1:5

My expensive coffee is almost gone, and I wonder if I will remember the graciousness of God. If I will call to memory His infinite wisdom when a complaint is pressing on my lips. Lord, I beg of You wisdom. Eyes to see Your goodness in my pain.  

 

2013 has come to a close. And it was amazing.

Last night I was reflecting on 2013 and the things God has done in my life. It was an amazing time of recalling God's blessing and lessons. Several of my friends have been writing about the past year, so I thought I would join the band wagon! :)

New Year's Eve of 2012 as my family sat together in the living room, my older sister Jessica enthusiastically mentioned that she was excited about 2013 and anticipating the changes the new year might bring. And boy was she right!! This year has been one of hard adjustments, enjoyable escapades, daunting challenges, fulfilled dreams, and God's mercies. But enough with the adjectives. Let's get on with it.

My sister Jerusha wrote a blog post about the year over on her blog "It's a Serendipitous Life", and she did it so well I thought I would copy her format. ;) Go check it out here. It's amazing!!!!

Anyway...

1.) Last spring was spent applying for college and scholarships. My relationship with God strengthened as I sought His will about colleges and life plans. I also dual-enrolled at a community college in town as part of my last semester of high school.

2.) In April, I graduated from high school!!! This day was definitely a highlight of the past 12 years combined. ;)

 

 

3.) The spring was also entirely consumed with music!! I adore music, but I never thought I would get so stressed out by it. Thankfully, my parents gave me their sweet support and put up with my endless hours of practicing. :) I was also given the opportunity to perform a duet concerto and two solos for federation, play in my twenty-something and LAST piano recital, and audition for several music scholarships.

 

My piano teacher and me at my final piano recital. And who are those other crazy people? Oh, those are just my epic best friends. I'm proud to say we're related. 

 

4.) In May, we helped my brother and sister-in-law moved five hours north of town. Two months later, Josiah started medical school! It was a bittersweet trip to help them move, but we are excited to see what the Lord is doing in their lives! 

 

 

 We really like our brother. :) He looks so doctor-ish already!

 

5.) A MAJOR part of my life this last year was my month-long trip to Nicaragua. I met some amazing people, had some life changing experiences, but most of all, grew closer to God than I ever imagined possible! It's interesting what a month without family and comfort zones will do with one's walk with the Lord.

 

 

 6.) My sister Jessica moved to Africa this year for missions. The day she moved was probably the hardest day of the year. I am extremely proud of her and have loved every minute of watching her journey with God!! I love you, sis! <3

 

 

 

7.) I started working Panera Bread in September! I love trying to make people smile. It's a hobby of mine. ;)

 

8.) The most exciting thing of my year - and other than becoming a Christian, my life - is number eight When my daddy told me somebody wanted to court me, I was completely blown away. Something I had always dreamed of happening, but it was actually coming true right then and there!  

 

Thadden Cymbaluk. I am beyond blessed by this amazing man of God. Needless to say, the past few months have been especially fantastic. :D

 

There is my year in a little nutshell! My life has changed drastically since a year ago, and it will change more in the years to come, but I know that I can be confident in this one thing. God never changes. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Change, whether it be exciting or challenging, can be the Lord's way of drawing us closer to Him. The unchanging Rock. Fortress. Strong Deliverer.

To God be the glory, great things He hath done!

Nicaraguan Adventures - Wrapping up the month

Almost a month has past since I left Nicaragua. I can hardly believe how fast the time has gone! Before I forget all the important details of the last half of my trip, I wanted to record them here.

On Monday, June 17th, my traveling companion, Hart, asked me what I thought of leaving a couple weeks early. She had become sick and needed to go back the States before the scheduled time. Honestly I didn't know what I wanted to do! Had I been asked the same question a week or so before, I would have jumped at the chance to fly back home early. I missed my family so much.  But it seemed that God had been softening my heart to these people and to the country of Nicaragua.  I desperately wanted to go home, but I was also curious about what else the Lord had in store for me in this country.  After discussing logistics with my parents, we decided that it was best for me to stay in Nicaragua while Hart went home.  And I'm so glad I did.

Monday through Wednesday of the following two weeks were spent starting a preschool in the little village of Mateare (the community Project H.O.P.E is building).  The community center in the village was filled with the voices of little kids every morning!  It was incredible to see the kids that were enthusiastic about school and learning (and playing with the "gringos"). ;)  During the first couple of days, we would see little girls dressed in their best Sunday dresses, and little boys freshly showered and sporting a clean pair of pants.  That didn't include all the kids, though...some were simply dressed in the only clothes they had available, but they were still at school and ready to learn!

On the last day that I would be at the preschool, we all said our goodbyes and Fran (another highly educated lady - that Hart knew - that was starting the preschool) and I headed for the truck to take us to the Base.  While we were waiting for our ride, I noticed a lady come out of her little house.  I recognized her as being one of the teacher helpers for the preschool and realized that I hadn't told her goodbye!  I quickly walked over to her and she met me in the middle of the street.  She (her name was Christina) started talking with me and we discussed our families, interests, and different topics. Suddenly, she was telling me how she appreciated my friendship and wished I didn't have to leave!  I was touched.  Moments later, Christina beckoned me to come to her house so she could show me around.  I followed her and she lead me to her beaten-down shack a couple streets away.  As I entered her home, I saw her obvious love for art.  The front of the shack was painted and her door was decorated with her lovely artwork.  Christina lead me around her tiny home and then introduced me to her children - Gabriela, Kimberlin, and Joshua.  As soon as they met me, the girls grabbed some stickers (one of the few possessions they had) and started placing them on my shirt!  The way they show their love for someone is so special. 
Finally I had to say goodbye and leave the village.  Christina looked heartbroken and started crying.  Even though it was somewhat difficult to talk to each other through the language barrier, we had still developed a friendship and found a connection in Christ! 

I was up by 4:00 AM on my last morning in Nicaragua.  I tried my best to be quiet while getting ready to go to the airport so I didn't wake any of my seven roommates.  As I walked out the door, the humidity, along with the realization that this was really my last day there, hit me.  I was picked up from Base and driven to the airport.  Travis, my chauffeur to the airport, told me what to expect when going through security and customs.  I was so grateful he calmed my nerves and gave me some valuable information about the trip!  By the time I finally made it to Miami airport, I was feeling much more comfortable traveling alone! ;) 

To wrap up my time in Nicaragua . . . I'm so grateful that I was able to go to this amazing country and meet some incredible people!  Most of all, I'm thankful to God for drawing me close to Him during the month and helping me to completely depend on His strength and love. 

Nicaraguan Adventures - Highlights from Week 2

Sunday, June 9th - I was wandering around the compound waiting for the van to arrive to pick us up for our trip to Leon, when Hart came out and asked if I had called my parents yet that week. "I can do that?!" I asked in surprise. She lead me into the "library" and handed me a cordless phone. I could hardly believe it! I nervously punched in the numbers, hoping desperately that it would work. A few tries later, my dad answered the phone and I started bawling. I was so happy to hear his voice! That was a good day. :)

Sunday evening Hart, Monica (a speech pathologist that was helping Hart), Mary Ann, Rebekah, and I climbed on the van and headed for a town an hour-and-a-half away. We arrived that evening in Leon, Nicaragua and were dropped off at "Hostal Italian". The hotel rooms were air-conditioned, so I was VERY grateful!

We spent that week going to a preschool that was established 12 years ago. It took about 30-45 minutes to get to the village where the preschool was located. Monica worked with the 3-year-olds, and Hart worked with the 4- and 5-year-olds on identifying and writing their names. Goodness those kids are DARLING! :) While the three of us worked at the preschool, Mary Ann and Rebekah were across the street teaching the mothers of the preschoolers how to sew and do different crafts!

Nathali was a smart little 3-year-old! She is the most darling thing ever.

Hart working with two of the kids from the 4- and 5-year-old group!

Since the work at the preschool only took up the morning hours, we were free to explore the town of Leon, shop, or just rest for the remainder of the day. It was a very relaxing week all-in-all. We even had the opportunity to go to the beach and have lunch! Another bonus of the place we stayed was that there was a little coffee shop across the street. (Oh wait...maybe it was a downfall...) They had coffee, frappes, and desserts for a very reasonable price. So yes, we didn't hesitate too much when taking advantage of it!



Our team for the week. Love these gals!
R-L: Monica, Me, Hart, Mary Ann, and Rebekah

When we finished our work with the preschoolers on Friday, we came back to the Project H.O.P.E. base. Saturday morning was a memorable experience for this Missouri gal! At 11:34 that morning I was introduced to my first legit earthquake. The ground didn't shake as much as ROLL. And it kept on rolling for at least 30 seconds. It was strange, and made me rather nauseous! I looked it up online later and found out that it was a 6.5 magnitude earthquake! It was a neat thing to experience...but only because it was 50 miles from the coast!

Later on that morning, our host family invited me to come with them on their "family day"! I was thrilled to join them! We went to McDonald's for lunch and then to the theater to see "Man of Steel".

Well that pretty much wraps up week two of Nicaragua! The Lord is continually blessing the work down here and keeping everyone safe. Praise His Holy Name!

 

Nicaraguan Adventures - Week One

Hola from the very warm country of Nicaragua!! :)

I thought I would give you all a summary of my adventures here thus far!! So here goes!

My first week in Nicaragua had its ups and downs. I flew into Managua on the same flight as Hart (A bilingual speech pathologist that I am learning from and semi-traveling with). When we disembarked the airplane, we met most of the other people on our team! The team was from a church in Rogersville, and they were staying one week.

My first impression: I was very homesick, and the place I was staying had no internet. BUT, it proved to be a blessing in disguise for my spiritual life. Since I didn't really know anyone on the trip (and I couldn't talk with my family), I had to lean completely on Christ! It seemed like every time I opened my Bible, God powerfully spoke to me through the words that I read. A few times I started crying as I realized that God knew exactly what I was struggling with and He Himself was going to comfort and uphold me.

I serve an awesome God.

I also found it difficult to adapt to Nicaragua in the beginning because, even though it IS poor, it is so much better than Haiti. I had to learn not to compare Haiti with Nicaragua, but instead see the people and the country through an untainted view.

We arrived late Saturday night on June 1st. The team loaded Project H.O.P.E.'s school bus and was driven to the Base. We were greeted by the sweetest host family ever! Roger and Kiki Gibson and their three kids are priceless. They are so welcoming and godly...it's a pleasure to be around them! A quick meeting was held outdoors, and then we all charged the dining room area to get some delicious dinner. :)

I was so grateful to see that there was electricity, air-conditioning, and hot showers on base! And the food here...wow! It is INCREDIBLE! The cook for Project H.O.P.E. used to work at the American Embassy, so the food is nothing short of amazing. :)

On Sunday we went to church (it's a church for missionaries, so it was in English!) and heard a message on "Immanuel - God with us". Again, I felt as if God were speaking directly to me and comforting my heart through the sermon!

That afternoon we headed out for the village of Mateare. Throughout this year, Project H.O.P.E has 19 teams lined up to come to Nicaragua and help finish building the community of Mateare. Originally this group of people lived by a lake here, but three years ago they were flooded out. They moved to a plot of land, and for three years PH has been bringing in teams and helping these sweet people build their tiny houses. 2013 is PH's last year in Mateare and they are building the last 72 houses this year. :)

Every morning we met the Nicaraguans at a large tree in the village and we worshipped God and had a devotional together. Then we broke into small groups and had another devotional/share time with the people. Afterwards, we went to work laying bricks, putting on roofs, nailing in siding, and laboring side-by-side with the Nicaraguans!

The kids here are so super cute! They hang all over you and say "HOLA!!" so many times you think your ear might fall off! ;) There is almost always a little one nearby who will prance right up to you and grab your hand. But it's not just the kids that are welcoming...the adults will give hugs, eagerly talk to you, and display a heartfelt smile if you happen to walk by them. It truly is amazing how friendly and kind these people are!

Before leaving on our trip, everybody from our team was given a Nicaraguan family (sometimes two or three people shared a family) for which to buy household items. The assigned family was then each individuals adopted family for the week! Throughout the week we would spend time with our Nica families and build up a relationship with them! It was like an immediate acceptance!

On Thursday afternoon, everybody on the team (about 50 of us from Missouri) met up with our Nicaraguan families and went to their shacks with them. Our gifts of household items(and a few other fun things) were packaged up in large rice sacks. I shared a family with Hart and her granddaughter! Our family in particular was made up of a husband and wife, two boys (5- and 12-years-old) and a grandmother. They were the most precious family! We gave them our gifts, and while watching them unpack the different items, I couldn't help but think "I wish I had something more to give them!". They were so poor, but so grateful. After opening the gifts, the father shared his testimony and we all talked for a while.

Oh! I also got to give them a laminated photo of my family!! It totally amazed me to see their faces as they looked at my sisters, brothers, and parents. They were mesmerized by people they had never even met. They were also ecstatic when I told them the picture was for them to keep! :)

Well, that pretty much sums up (in a LOT of words) my first week in Nicaragua! Right now I'm almost done living out week three, so obviously I have a lot of writing to do yet!

"Praise the Lord from whom all blessing flow!"

Another post!! ;)

I just got the urge to go camping. I think it's because I'm sitting in my room, the sun is starting to peek through the blinds on my windows, and I keep hearing a little bird chirp a little ditty outside.
Isn't God's creation wonderful? It's especially noticeable to me in the spring when the daffodils started poking their heads above the slowly warming ground; when the sun gets just a tad warmer and gently kisses your face when you step outside; when the once-brown-yard suddenly turns a gorgeous shade of green; when it unexpectedly pours down rain and the sky flashes with lightening; when you start taking long walks down trails because the beauty of everything blooming around you is overwhelming.

Talking about it almost makes me warm up. Almost.

But truly, what a magnificent God to think about the tiny details of what He created and making them pleasurable for us!! He deserves so much praise!!

Well, I'm sorry for the short post, but I must get ready for church! :)  Oh, and if y'all happen to think about it, I would love some prayer for this upcoming piano federation. I have two solo pieces and one concerto to memorize by March 9th. The solos are coming along fairly well, but I just recently got my 16 page concerto . . . . so I'm rather scared on that one! I would love prayer that God would give me patience and a good memory to memorize all of these pieces. Thank you!

My Prayer

God, help me to have a passionate longing for You.
May I not be satisfied with a mediocre relationship with the Creator of the universe.
I pray that my days, hours, and mere moments would be centered on YOU - my Lord, my Savior, and my King.
Help me to cast all my cares upon you. (1 Peter 5:7) Make me to realize how much you care for me.
Lord, I pray that you would help me to have a deep compassion and unfeigned love for those around me. Give me Your grace and impartiality when I look at others.
May 2013 be a year I always remember and look back upon as being incredibly strengthening in my walk and relationship with You, dear Father.